Nine ways of seeing

Imagine nine people standing in a circle, facing inward. In the middle of that circle stands an elephant. If we were to travel around the circle asking each of those nine people about their experience, it wouldn’t be a surprise that each account would differ. The answer given by each of the nine wouldn’t simply …

Keeping the instrument in tune

Each year on the Post-graduate diploma counselling course, my colleague Dwight and I take the trainee therapists through an exercise of reflection on self-care. Perhaps more than any other profession, self-care for therapists is a vital consideration given how ’self’ is the instrument underpinning the relationship with our clients. If the therapist is responsible for …

Flanking guards

Moving beyond hope

As I sat on the garden bench at the front of my house this morning (flanked by my two tree friends), I was able to tune in to a deeper sense of contentment; this has been somewhat out of reach for me recently. I, like many of those I spoke to last week, felt the …

opening the heart

The courage to open

I’ve taken to asking people I meet online – friends, family, students, supervisees – the question “what are you learning about yourself in all of this?” I’m intrigued by the ‘growth’ aspects that the COVID-19 pandemic is revealing. As a relative newbie to the Vajrayana path, I am appreciative of the View – that the …

enneagram

The geometry of relationship

I’ve just returned from having a coffee in town with a friend: the perfect way to unwind and regenerate after a day of client work. It offers a way to see and feel the contrast in how relationships take or offer energy – and that isn’t a straightforward segregation as “clients take” and “friends give”; …